"When the joke's on you"

Remember back in Elementary school when you had pretend marraiges that only lasted from recess until last period? How about just high school freshman year flings? You look back at some of those pictures and remember how cute that person was then but now they look like they've been through a thing or two.

Now imagine that when you two were "married" back in the day it was sorta, kinda, official. .

A 14 year old girl has become the youngest ever to get divorced in Israel - after a rabbinical court ruled that a joke marriage ceremony she'd taken part in was valid.

The girl got accidentally married to a 17-year-old boy after joking around in the schoolyard. The boy recited the Jewish marriage ritual, declared her his wife, and she then accepted a ring from him - in front of witnesses.

Israel's Rabbinical Courts ruled that this - along with what they described as the consummation of the marriage - was enough to make them officially wed. " [Source - It happened in the UK]

That's a little much, but why go through the trouble of planning a mock ceremony without looking up all the facts? Surely she should have had some idea about what she was getting herself into.

Being divorced at 14 is not cute. I'm sure it gives you premature wrinkles or something.

"The things they lost in the fire. . "

With common sense, being one of them.

I'm sorry - I just HAD to! Sue me. I try to stay out of celebrity misfortune and just focus on plain ol' regular Joes like you and me having terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad days but if in fact People have their facts right. . *sigh* Rih-Rih might need another slap or two.

Actually, this time why doesn't someone just talk to her? Sit her down and explain to her that perhaps re-entering an abusive relationship isn't the best idea. Ecspecially after three weeks of counseling from media websites. I'm just sayin'.

Then again, people have gotten together again during worst situations, huh? Still it's hard to forget. . .

"Lovers may come and go but Herpes is forever"

Woman Unknowingly Infected With Herpes Awarded Nearly $7 Million!

PALM SPRINGS, Calif. — A lawyer said a Riverside County jury has awarded nearly $7 million to a 56-year-old woman who was unknowingly infected with herpes by a 77-year-old man.

Attorney Shaun Murphy, who represented the plaintiff, said the defendant knew he had genital herpes for more than 25 years but did not disclose it before his sexual relationship with the woman and did not use a condom." [Source - Fox News]

Absurdity.

I had no idea that you could sue someone for leaving out the fact that they have an incurable disease and get seven million for it. But honestly, that's the least she could have gotten out of the deal. Even at 56-years-old you should be able to play with other elders and not have to worry that after 77 years guys still haven't matured enough to tell you if they have an STD. I'm just sayin'.

Oh well, she's 7 million bucks richer. Cha-ching. All's well that ends well I guess.

"Another teacher behind bars"

Teacher Jailed, Accused of Sex With Student

GREENWOOD, S.C. — An Upstate middle school teacher remained jailed Monday after being charged with having sex with a student.

Angel Simmons Lindle, 37, was arrested Friday and charged with criminal sexual conduct with a minor.At a hearing Saturday morning, her bond was set at $126,000.

Lindle has been suspended from her job as a seventh-grade teacher at Edgewood Middle School in Greenwood County. She had been on medical leave since September.

According to warrants, Lindle admitted to having a sexual relationship with the student, a a 15-year-old boy.Police said the encounters happened numerous times in Greenwood and McCormick counties from August 2008 until last week, at motels, at Lindle’s home, and in parked vehicles.Investigators said they were alerted when someone called authorities to complain about the relationship." [Source - Greenville News]

I can't help but think that this would be a much bigger outrage if the 15-year-old boy was a 15-year-old girl. Granted, statutory rape any way you look at it is wrong - but I feel like more people would be attacking this woman's name if the sexes were reversed. Someone mentioned this at OHN and there might be some truth to that.

"Grindin'"

Not another injured penis!!

A man whose penis met an ill fate with a grinder in Brisbane's north this afternoon has been rushed to hospital.

It is understood the 23-year-old was working in Northgate when he was injured just after 2pm."

[Source - Brisbane Times]

There's nothing like a good old fashion castration to start the week off right. It's a shame because he was only 23-years-old. I'm hoping he got good use out of it for the first 23 years.

Since they didn't want to identify what kind of "grinder" it was that injured him, you'll just have to use your imagination with the picture I've provided. I'm just curious as to why his member was even in a position to be injured. . .aren't you?

*scratches head*

"Just don't online date"

Just don't do it. You've been warned.

A handful of women are romanced out of almost $300,000 in a Nigerian romance hoax

For one woman, the online dating scheme started when the unidentified middle-aged divorcee received text messages last year from a man about 10 years younger than her.

"They said, 'You know, you're a very pretty lady, I like your profile,'" the victim told the Edmonton Sun. "You feel very flattered."

After several more e-mails, instant messages and phone calls, the man promised to come to Canada and marry her.

Then came the requests for money, including one that claimed the man's son was hospitalized and needed three surgeries, the Sun reported. The scheme continued for about five months.

"I had so many friends tell me, 'Don't send money,'" she said. "But you love that person, you believe what they say. You don't want to stop." [Source]

The chances of them finding the band of thieves are slim to none, not to mention that money which is also probably long gone. It's sad, man. It really is. Middle-aged women are the easiest targets.

But ummmm - he said he was coming to Canada to marry you? And you never met? But you've been married before, are accustomed to the usual wedding experience, and still didn't see this hot mess coming? What up with that?

"Survival of the fittest"

Recession spreads overseas causing man to eliminate concubines!

BEIJING, China (CNN) — A married Chinese businessman who could no longer afford five mistresses held a competition to decide which one to keep.

But the contest took a fatal turn when one of the women, eliminated for her looks, drove the man and the four other competitors off a cliff, Chinese media reported.

The spurned mistress died and the other passengers were injured, the reports said."

[Source - OHN]

I love how the mistress died while the main targets only got a couple of boo-boos (or not, still. . .they're alive). I guess she didn't work out her exit strategy very well.

This married businessman realized after looking in his bank account that having five relationships was just getting a little bit too costly now because of the way the worldwide economy is suffering. So how does he choose which mistress to keep? Why, a beauty pageant of course. What he didn't do was cover all the bases like what happens when one of these side girls takes her elimination the wrong way and tries to kill everybody.

Then, of course, after it's all over and they all leave the ER his wife and the remaining side joints leave him.

Pimpin ain't easy.

"Why you shouldn't care if he doesn't care"

5 Reasons to skip 'He's just not that into you'

We are all clingy, insane, insecure, naive, trusting idiots, who drive away our boyfriends and potential bfs by being like that. I don’t know about you, but movies that continuously reiterate that I’m completely psycho and clingy tend to turn me off at about the 60 minute mark." [Source - College News]

Ooh, it hurts - doesn't it?

I haven't had the chance to see this movie and I'm really not looking forward to the prospect. My friend suggested we go for [as you can expect] "a girl's night out." Since we're both super singles I'm not seeing the fun in being reminded why, as my great aunt would say: "we can't keep a man."

I do think it's cute, though. The premise. And from the way that chick is ranting - somewhat true. However, there's nothing even remotely appealing about being reminded why you're insecure and then being mocked for being insecure. In what realm of crazy is that okay?

Then again the single ladies might enjoy it more than any girl who's in a commited relationship. Your mind will be insidiously flooded with doubts about your man and what you think you have. Those who celebrated V-Day solo can actually take a sigh of relief because there's nothing to wonder about if it's not there to begin with.

"Boyfriend woes"

Msnbc.com has a video about some boyfriend/horror stories you might want to check out. I've noticed lately that my news has been spotlighting a lot of psychotic females, so I thought this would be a nice change. Guys mess up, too.

Often, in fact. Hehe =]

Visit msnbc.com for Breaking News, World News, and News about the Economy

"Cruelty to Elders"

Ohio Transgendered woman excersizes husband to death

CHARDON, Ohio — An Ohio transgender woman has pleaded guilty to reckless homicide for exercising her 73-year-old husband to death in an apartment complex swimming pool.

Now you know why this is news-worthy, right? Because s/he's transgendered. Duh.

This is my way of saying Happy-freakin-Valentine's Day to you and yours. The lovely thing about this story is that she's actually pleading guilty, which is refreshing, considering I don't know of many people who would admit to trying to kill their spouse through something that appears was intended to help them.

Middlefield police say surveillance video shows 41-year-old Christine Newton-John pulling James Mason around the pool by his arms and legs and preventing him from leaving. [Source]

Oh. . .I didn't read that part =\ off to jail you go, Ms. Newton-John.

I don't know about you but I personally can't wait to see the plethora of true V-day stories gone wrong that are bound to show up this weekend. It makes being single more than worth it, doesn't it?

"V-Day misunderstanding"

Valentine lover recreates rose petal scene from American Beauty.






Lesley Heague booked a hotel's penthouse suite and covered the bed in red rose petals to act out the provocative sequence from the 1999 blockbuster.

The blonde 25-year-old even hired a photographer to capture her version of the scene, made famous by actress Mena Suvari, for a personalised card.

[Source]

This would have been a really sweet gesture. . imagine that? Buying thousands of rose petals to recreate your boyfriend's favorite movie, booking a suite, hiring a photographer, getting little greeting cards made - the works! Then you find out that what you thought was American Beauty should have really been American Gangster. Smack yourself. Twice for emphasis.

I think what she tried to do would have been extra perfect if it were for the correct movie [obviously]. I just don't think there's a scene in American Gangster that would have been appropriate for a Valentine's Day movie-themed weekend. . .was there?

& I bet the guy wasn't even grateful that she had at least made the effort. Hmph. I'm not bitter, I'm just sayin'.

"Dangers with a Wii remote"

Man accused of choking girlfriend with a WII controller

Over - get this - COOKIES.

An Austin man has been accused of trying to choke his girlfriend with the cord of a Wii video game controller after she became angry that he had eaten all of her Girl Scout cookies, according to an arrest affidavit.

I wouldn't make this stuff up. [Source]

Basically this is the kind of thing that goes on in normal households when a heated argument ensues but no one ever actually has the guts to say, "Yes, I used a Wii controller because that was the first thing I could get my hands on."

I've never gotten into a physical altercation with a boyfriend but I can think of quite a few times when me and my younger brother went at each others throats using much more. . .deliberate weapons. Not knives or anything like that. . .just furniture.

"So you want to break up? Think twice."

Cali boy tries to cut out girlfriends' implants because since he paid for them, they're "his."

*rolls eyes*

Well somebody was feelin' a little salty about their breakup.

VICTORVILLE, Calif. - A spurned lover ambushed his ex-girlfriend and tried to cut out the breast implants he paid for by stabbing her, prosecutors say.

San Bernardino County prosecutor David Foy said 28-year-old Thomas Lee Rowley attacked his ex in July 2006 outside her mother's home in Hesperia, some 70 miles northeast of Los Angeles in the Mojave Desert.

[Source]

That makes me so angry. Not just because stabbing someone 6 times after a break up is down right rude, but also because this guy gives new meaning to the phrase 'Indian Giver'. Call me crazy, but I thought certain things like virginity and breast implants were non-refundable gifts.

"Countdown to apology"

Beyonce: "And this is how big of a star you are compared to me."

It really saddens me when celebrities let their egos get the best of them. Really, it does.

Etta James is going on 128 actin' like a damn teenager for the media all because Beyonce out-sang her song for the inauguration. I'm sure you've all already heard about this and are shaking your heads just as hard as I am. Now James is threatening, and I quote, "to beat a b*tch's a*s" [I hate profanity too, but Etta said it - not I] and denouncing Obama as her president. Come on now, Etta.

I understand that she's a soul legend and my feelings would be extra hurt as well if my president chose my understudy instead of me to sing my own song when I'm still alive, but there's no need for name-calling. . .

“You guys know your president, right?” she asked the crowd. “The one with the
big ears? He ain’t my president. He might be yours…” she continued, before
adding that “that woman he had singing for him…she’s gonna get her ass whipped.
The great Beyonce…I can’t stand Beyonce.”

[Source]

Lol. I'm sorry. I just think sour old women are hee-larious. And you know you're secretly hoping Beyonce sucks it up and stops feeling personally attacked [even if she was] long enough to fire some equally stinging comments. My only question is how long before Etta apologizes? I think this happened a few days ago. Her PR people need to step their games up.

"Meet Jade Leather Heat"

That would be my stripper name.

Like clockwork, every time the Bursar’s office is demanding money or threatening to kick us out of our school for being semesters late on tuition payment after my room mate and I pray to the financial gods we always semi-entertain the idea of getting into the lucrative, yet emotionally suicidal business of dancing.

I know I am not the only college-aged female who has joked about this yet still been almost, kinda/sorta in a way dead serious. I personally don’t think I could do it unless maybe a child was involved or I needed an operation that my insurance wasn’t covering – the two extremes – but I can feel any girl who chooses to take that route. Working a minimum-wage gig that you know isn’t going to make a dent in your bills is probably a waste of time and so, if you’re willing to take the risk of the personal damage it could have on your life and substitute your money for your pride then to each his/her own, I guess.

I will never come at a girl’s head for doing what she feels she has to do when it seems all the other options have been exhausted. Loans? Denied – bad credit, bad economy. Grants? Few and far between. Scholarships? If you’ve got ‘em, ride them out. Scholarships should be your backbone so if you have one make sure you keep in good standing. However, for those without scholarships, without money in the family, and without loans and grants, is work-study or part-time retail sales supposed to take its place? I don’t think so.

"As a former call girl, I know plenty of people in the industry, and I recently
spoke to several who have started doing kink work to supplement their incomes,"
Quan writes in The Daily Beast." [Source]

For the record though – as much as becoming a dominatrix may have it’s positives with you only having to work an hour for around $80-$200 and not having to worry about sexual intercourse with the client, like any other job in the sexual entertainment industry there’s going to be an emotional after effect and sometimes it’s just not worth it. I would probably have to do some watered-down version of body/skills-selling like being a call girl or something, which with my luck would end up being the most dangerous one yet because of the one-on-one-not-everyone-knows-where-you-are aspect. Sigh.

Whether it’s stripping or becoming a dominatrix however, college-aged ladies like myself aren’t the only ones considering this form of free lance work. Women with full-time jobs are signing on just to pick up some extra money [maybe for gas?]. Watch out now.

"Reason number 1 for why you shouldn't take Facebook seriously"

"MIAMI — Katherine Evans said she was frustrated with her English teacher for
ignoring her pleas for help with assignments and a brusque reproach when she
missed class to attend a school blood drive.

So Ms. Evans, who was then a high school senior and honor student, logged
onto the networking site Facebook
and wrote a rant against the teacher, Sarah Phelps."

Long story short, Katie Evans now has on her permanent record that she got pissed off with her teacher and earned herself 3-day suspension for whining about it on Facebook. *sigh* I'm all for social networking websites and freedom of speech [clearly] but the girl went so far as to basically create a hate group targeting her teacher. That's a little much, don'tcha think?

“You can express an opinion on whether someone is a good teacher,” said Pamela
Brown, assistant director for the Broward County School District who oversees
expulsions. “But when you start inviting people to say that they hate a teacher,
that crosses the line.”

[Source - NY Times]

I'm sure this girl thought that starting the post, getting feedback, and then removing it within a week wasn't going to come back and bite her, but it seems she was wrong. In less than two months after making the post she was called down to the principal's office and got her little sentence of suspension.

She's now attending the University of Florida as a freshman and is only suing her principal to get her record cleared. She doesn't even care about them trying to OD on her life by blowing this out of complete proportion. It's only Facebook. No one was hurt. It's not like she was saying the teacher commited some felony.

I just think it's a little much on both parts. No, Katie should not have gotten other Facebook-ers involved in throwing dirt on the teachers' name and No, I don't think she should have gotten suspended. No harm, no foul. I think it's safe to say she learned her lesson. Just let this be a warning to those who like to excersize free speech though - It's okay as long as you don't start a group targeting one person, apparently.

"The benefits of friends"

I’ve never really understood the concept of friends with benefits. I really in my heart don’t think there’s a way for it to work out beneficial for both people. Just knowing females and the way they think/operate [because I am one] means those “benefits” are going to lead to complications. However, if you’re absolutely sure it’s something you’re willing to give a shot because. . .I don’t know, maybe you’re just in need of action or you’re attracted to the person minus all their personality flaws, I think that these rules should apply:

1.) Be unattached. As in, BOTH of you. If someone’s in a relationship, toying with the idea of a relationship or any of the like then clearly that someone is cheating or a potential cheater. Let’s be grown up about this. No we’re not “friends who mess around.” That’s malarkey.

2.) Set the rules up beautifully from the beginning. The relationship is strictly for hook-up purposes only. This is where ish starts getting complicated because I kind of don’t know of a successful friends with benefits relationship where somebody didn’t catch feelings some kind of way. . .but then if that happens. . .

3.) . . .as soon as feelings are involved END THE RELATIONSHIP!!! I can’t stress this mess enough. Whether it’s the guy or the girl – it does not matter! Unless miraculously you BOTH wanna make a relationship outta thin air happen, just end it. Go back to being friends or acquaintances if you can. Once feelings are involved there is no turning back.

4.) There’s always the chance that your buddy might meet someone they wanna get serious with and when that happens, do not cock block. As Luther Vandross and Beyonce would say, “Let’s get love a try.” You never know – they might end up being something serious and you’ll always be that one person their partner can’t stand because your cockblockin’ self was all up in the mix trying to keep your little hook-up pact going. Be still.

That’s all I’ve got so far. . .obviously, beneficial friends have been on my mind since relationships right now are a bust *sigh* I’m just trying to spread some knowledge. It’s no surprise to me that sixty-two percent of Blacks have experienced more friends with benefits relationships than actual relationships. What's that sayin', huh?

I think you know.

"Texting will lead to nothing but trouble"

Next week my friends and I plan on seeing "He's not that into you" [Sex & the city fans know where this originated from ;] and in one of the previews Drew Barrymore is complaining about being rejected by 7 different technologies including but not limited to Myspace, Facebook [or Crackbook, as I like to call it], AIM, text messaging, and phone calls. It looks hilarious and even if it's not I'll probably pretend it is and blog about it. Anyway, that's what brings about this post on my problem with texting.

I understand that we have evolved as human beings and actual human interaction isn't always necessary but there is something very wrong with texting someone and then not being able to say two words to them when you see them in person. It's just like 'friending' someone on Myspace, seeing them in person, and then questioning your eyesight. It just doesn't add up.

There's nothing wrong with having text buddies though, aka people you know you strictly plan on texting because when you hear their voice it puts you into a coma or makes you wanna throw up a little bit. If it keeps you busy between classes, on the train, or during a break, then go for it. However, obsessive texting is where I would have to draw the line. This is why our generation is going to grow up with carpal tunnel just in our thumbs.

With that being said, you know I just looove seeing this. . .

"Toddlers can soon obsessively text and type like their parents on a pint-sized personal digital assistant made by LeapFrog."

. . I'm guessing that because kids see their parents texting hardbody they feel the need to be a part. That makes sense. It actually doesn't hook up to the internet but just "simulates" texting because apparently toddles aged 3-5 think it's fun. The plus side is that there actually is some educational value in it and kids are allowed to play games. Still though . .is texting really that serious? Fake texting included. The main purpose of this toy was to simulate the Crackberry.

"For future reference"

I've blogged before but hardly on a regular basis, so bare with me =] This particular blog will probably have loads of my opinion, but I promise that I'll back it up with facts [most of the time]. Basically all I want to do is comment - hence, the name, "This needs commentary." To me, everything mentioned in here just needed to be spoken on. It just needed to.

Whether it be about college life and tips for how to survive dorming, issues that young minorities like myself may face, relationships, current events, etc. etc. It's a wide sphere of topics but they all connect. Somehow.'

I'm a girl, I'm indecisive. . .work with me.